It's Friday night!

You know you might need to re-evaluate your life when the anonymous person you're playing "Words With Friends" with on your phone asks you what your plans are and all you can answer is "catching up on TV"

The sad part is, that's a lie. You're actually caught up on the TV and you're rewatching the second season of 30 Rock. Also, you've discovered that your new favorite thing is a mixture of medium grade whiskey, crystal light ice tea, and diet off brand lemon-lime soda. Oh, and that the main reader of your blog is your boss.

I came home today after running my awesome errands. And there were three main things that I realized.

1) If you're at the alcohol store that is roughly the size of a Walmart with your dog, and you're talking about wine choices with your dog... You're one of the few people sadder than me.

2) The company I work for... to the public eye, will end due to severe lack of customer service. My mechanic called me today to ask me a favor related to my company, because she couldn't get any service. Then I went into the store and sales associates actively avoided me as I went to ask them for help finding something.

3) One of my basil plants might not make it. As I have taken to talking to my plants, this is very upsetting.

Whatever, I'm still better off than "Chauncy, should we get the Oregon or Washington wine tonight?"

So my boss is the biggest troll that ever trolled

So, he gets upset when I won't let him on my personal twitter, but he apparently reads this blog where I do actually show my crazy.

And my mother was worried about Facebook. If she only fucking knew.

It also occurs to me that her birthday is soon and I will have to call her again soon, and I would rather do something horrible. Like use a gasoline soaked tampon. I feel that that might do something fucked up to me. Or be really fun. Whatever.

So, the sounds of my cell phone telling me I have email is starting to raise my blood pressure significantly. And my computer screen just flashed at me, so I assume that someone just hacked in and is now watching me type this. Vagina.

I don't know, that's just the paranoia speaking to me. I assume that everyone here is watching me all the time. Makes me want to just wear a nothing but a trenchcoat and scream YOU WANT ALL OF ME! YOU GOT IT FUCK FACES! And then watch as they take tear out their eyeballs.

My boss, now known as King Troll for the purposes of the blog, is tempting the gods by trying to turn up the AC. Like we didn't have a massive server failure earlier. Dumbass.